Bingo Jokes
Much enjoyment and hilarity are had in and around both land based bingo halls and online bingo chat rooms and we have heard some great jokes over the years, below you will find the pick of some of the best bingo jokes as well as the best Bingo Memes on the web. Prepare yourself.
Scroll Down for our List of Bingo Jokes
Best Bingo Rooms Online
Funny Jokes about Bingo
Bingo halls are full to the brim of many things, but 3 make a particular impression; the players; prizes and the amount of fun everyone is having gossiping and joking around. Sounds familiar right?
The numbers game is notoriously social, built around engaging with neighbors, meeting up with pals for a game and chatting away as the bingo caller gets busy calling the numbers and whipping up the crowd. It’s often felt that the online world boasts more of the fun elements of bingo, but a whole lot less of the community vibe. There have been moves to combat that, with the creation of bingo chat games.
When you use play bingo games and use an online bingo chat, having a bingo joke or story will help you break the ice and make easy conversation or maybe you just want to sit back and have a good old Bingo themed chuckle.
(If you’re easily offended, you may want to close your eyes for the rest of this post as it features cold, stone humour that won’t appeal to all tastes)
What has a whole bunch of balls and screws old ladies?
A bingo machine!
How do you get a bunch of old ladies to shout the f word?
Get someone to shout “Bingo!”
What do vampires play Bingo with?
Stake money!
What do rodents say when they play bingo?
‘Eyes down for a full mouse’!
What do you call a lady addicted to gambling at bingo?
Betty!
The 10 Commandments of Bingo1.Thou shalt not sit in thy neighbour’s lucky seat.2.Thou shalt not stare at thy neighbour’s card.3.Thou shalt not take the Callers name in vain.4.Thou shalt not call false “Bingo”.5.Thou shalt not wish bad luck on thy neighbour.6.Thou shalt not threaten to kill the “Caller”.7.Thou shalt not steal thy husband’s money for Bingo (oh, alright you can do this one).8.Thou shalt not brag about how much thou hast won.9.Thou shalt not whine about how much thou hast lost.10.Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s winnings.
Bingo Funny Stories
The Blond Bingo Game
It was a ladies-only night in the All Blonde Bingo Hall, one of the most popular Bingo in the USA. The night had been pretty boring; not one single person had a BINGO all night. The last game was up for grabs, with a huge bingo prize of $3500.00 in the pot. The game went on till very late, and nearly every blonde in the house had to be on for the big blackout. Finally, G-47 was called, but still no shouts of “Bingo!” were heard. The frustrated caller finally gets up and throws the Bingo Machine off the stage. All the girls were shocked, and the caller said: “I’ve just called every darn one of these 75 balls out of this machine, and nobody has a Bingo? Just what number are you ladies waiting for?” All together, the 412 blond ladies shouted: “FREE SPACE!”
The New York Bingo Caller
One day, a guy is struck by a bus on a busy New York City Street. He lies, covered in blood with one dying wish, for a priest to bless him. The onlookers and police call out for a priest, but there is none. Out of the crowd steps a little old Jewish man of at least eighty years of age. “Mr. Policeman,” says the man, “I’m not a priest, I’m not even a Catholic, but for fifty years now, I’ve been living behind St. Elizabeth’s Catholic Church on First Avenue, and every night I’m listening to the Catholic litany. Maybe I can be of some comfort to this man.” The policeman agrees, and they approach the dying man. The Jewish man kneels at his side and, in a solemn voice, calls: “B-4. I-19. N-38. G-54. O-72. . .”.
The Tale of the Bingo Divorcee
Angela was chatting away to her best bingo buddy, Kate, about her husband with whom she’d had a recent falling out. ”My husband said I had to choose between him and bingo… I’m gonna miss him …!”
Funny Bingo Memes
- Bingo Grumpy Cut “You’ll be Sorry”
- I Don’t Always Cheat
- Bingo Tax – In the 2014 Conservative Party budget ran an political advert stating they would cut the bingo and beer tax to reward hard working people – a good thing. However many looked at this as presenting the Conservatives as out of touch and saying that all hardworking people like beer and bingo. The internet reacted and made several diffent meems mocking the “upper class” nature of the poster.
- Bingo Meme “I Ride”
- “Is that a bra size or a bingo call?”
- “It’s a bingo”
- “That Moment When”
We hope you enjoyed the jokes and bingo memes as much as we did, if you like your bingo fun why not try out either our Bingo Lingo Quiz or discover more about Bingo Cards.